A Candid Conversation With Some Brothers on Love ~

I thank God for some of the brothers in my life... Strong, Whole, Mature Brothers, who were not afraid to let God heal them from the damage done by bad choices and negative experiences when it comes to relationships. I recently had a pretty intense conversation with a couple of these brothers and I hit them with some very direct questions about why men behave the way they do, when it comes to love and romance. We discussed questions like,

Why men have an issue with a woman approaching them first... 
Why they deny love when God intentionally sends love their way...
Why they just go silent when they're not interested instead of just saying that openly and directly... Is it that particular woman? Is it fear or uncertainty? Bad breath? What's up with that?
Why they act like they don't need love when God clearly says they do...
What is proper way for a woman to ask for what she needs without appearing thirsty or desperate...

In response, one brother openly admitted to being selfish and self-centered as a main reason a lot of men do not engage women in a healthy way. When a man is self-focused, he will allow fear, greed, pride and selfishness to drive his decisions and his actions, while he pushes honesty and vulnerability to the back seat. Just kinda going for what he wants, what feels good, what feels safe and what's easiest to handle. 

After all, bringing a woman (and possibly kids) into the sanctity of a man's life, is a huge undertaking and the risks for failure are astronomically high! All the men admitted that the risks that come with embracing love, is something that weighs heavily on their hearts and shoulders. Admittedly, it takes a lot of giving, changing, adjusting and sacrificing to engage love and not fail at it! Some men are just too overwhelmed with that idea, especially if he's failed before or he feels like he's being pushed to move faster than he's comfortable... even if that pressing is coming from God! 

So instead of taking on the challenges and believing God to negotiate them through this scary ordeal, they bail, run and hide... praying that if they ignore a woman long enough, she'll eventually give up and go away! 

Ouch! (I know that guy really well!)

Or as one brother admitted, instead of stepping up to embrace real love, they choose to play the game of love, trying to get the benefits, with the least amount of sacrifice and the least amount of entanglements!

This brother courageously confessed he'd been in several relationships, five, in fact, where he allowed the women to believe that marriage was on the horizon, when all along he was really too wounded to be a good husband to anyone and he really just wanted the sex. Yes, he strung along five women by dangling the promise of a wedding ring in front of their faces, while lying to them, directly in their faces! 

Wow... That was tough to hear, but I gave the brother kudos for his honesty!

Thankfully, he went on to explain that he was not really committed to God at that time in his life, so many of the issues that kept him from being able to commit to marriage or even being willing to change, were locked inside of a wounded heart that he was not ready to open. Yet, as he got closer to God and grew in faith, he began allowing God to help him deal with those issues and little by little, healing and wholeness began to come. And now, he is very much an emotionally whole and spiritually healthy Man of God, who is praying and watching with great hope and expectation for his wife to appear!. 

He even admitted that he wouldn't mind, at all, if his future wife stepped up to begin the conversation that could potentially lead to love. Now that he's no longer hung up on being in control of the process, he's willing to let God lead him to love, even if God chooses to use the woman, to give him a little nudge in the right direction! 

I So Love That!!!

Now I must admit, that talking with these men and hearing about their journey to the place they are today, was so refreshing and encouraging! I'm really excited with all that I heard because it proves that God can and will bring his people to a place of wholeness in the area of relationships, if we allow him to. And that's so important for us to know, and for me personally, because teaching believers to pursue and embrace romantic love, in a healthy and holy way, is a ministry mandate on my life! It's the business I'm in and it is a truly weighty call because God is SERIOUS about this marriage thing! 

Believe me, God talks to me A LOT about love, romance and sexuality! He truly wants to restore marriage to it's rightful place of honor and esteem in our personal lives, in the church and in the world, because there is just so much power in this covenant! This is why the enemy has worked so hard to destroy all that God has designed marriage to be! Marriage is a foundation of the kingdom, and strong Godly, mandated marriages must be established and allowed to grow, increase and thrive for the overall good of the kingdom and ultimately the world! 

As God is able to raise up more and more of these truly effective and productive mandated marriages in the earth, this will produce a greater display of His love and His power to the saved and the unsaved alike. Stronger marriages can then produce stronger neighborhoods, churches, communities and cities... and on and on, until we are able to change the world, through our example and the anointing of holy love that emanates from our lives!

But to do this, God needs whole, healthy, obedient and yielded vessels, to make this happen. And therein lies a huge challenge! While the love, romance and sex in marriage, when done right, is literally the most beautiful and amazing thing that a person can experience on this side of heaven, believers continually resist God in this area and CHOOSE to walk away from the possibility of love each and every day! 

That's why I appreciate, all that God has done in the lives of these individual men I had the pleasure of talking with. Their testimonies really do give me hope as well as inspire and challenge me, to continue teaching, preaching and releasing what God saying in this hour, in spite of the opposition I face. A lot of believers, male and female, are so burnt on marriage, so hurt from past relationships, so fearful of being hurt or taken advantage of, that they're not willing or able to even have this kind of open, candid dialogue, without calling my motives into question or thinking that I'm trying to manipulate them into a relationship. 

They don't see how unfair that is to me, when I'm just trying to help because that's what God told me to. Instead, they accuse and attack the messenger when they just need to read the mail and apply it to their lives! Right??? They need to stop getting upset with me and let God bring that very thing into their lives, that they've always hoped for! 

This Image, Right Here, Is What He's Trying To Do For You! Do Y'all Get That?

So Here's the Message, From God, to All of You He's Been Speaking to About Love: 

Stop being afraid of love! Stop ignoring and rejecting the person God is sending to love you and bless you and enhance your life for the better! Instead, take their hand, acknowledge what God is saying and what He's doing! Then take all of your concerns, to the altar and ask God to perfect everything that concerns you! Pray one for another that you may be healed and allow God to bring the help, the healing and the wholeness that you need, so you can embrace and engage love in a healthy way. 

This is essential because you must understand that holy love only comes by God's divine design! Anything less, will not yield all of the intended blessings that God wants you to experience. 

Therefore, if you want God's best and the fullness of His will to be made manifested in your life, then you've got to be open and ready to receive when true and genuine love comes calling!  And for some of you, God is shouting, LOVE IS ONE THE WAY! Love is coming up the walk and knocking on the front door!!! 

OPEN THE DOOR AND LET LOVE IN!!! Can You Say YES to Love Today???

Amen & Amen!

Sending You All Peace, Blessings and Most of All LOVE!

Ap. Mimi


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